How to Plan an Elopement
Want to know a trend that’s been gaining traction for quite a few years now?
Eloping.
It used to be viewed as “defiant”, done on a whim, or for those that don’t care about a big party. Well, that last one might be true for some couples, but if the pandemic taught us anything about weddings; it’s that some couples actually got to live out their intimate wedding or elopement dreams without being judged (FINALLY).
What is NOT true about all elopements, is that it doesn’t take planning. Some actually want to plan out their special day like any other couple: booking a photographer, scouting locations, and ordering your dream outfit months in advance. But, where do you start?
I thought the perfect person to ask would be Carrie Rogers of Carrie Rogers Photography, an incredible photographer who specializes in elopements and loves to travel with her couples wherever they want to be married. So here are some things you and your fiance should go over while planning:
let’s start with the legalities
Remember, legally binding yourself to another human is a requirement to being actually married. The “wedding” is the fun part. So, like any marriage, you need a license. These requirements vary by city, state, and country so be sure to check into this thoroughly and complete proper paperwork before the day of. Aside from any documents that might be required, you’ll also probably need:
An officiant to conduct the ceremony
A witness (or two) to sign the license
Another option is to get legally married at a courthouse before jetting off to your elopement location. This is a much easier option for those that want to get married internationally. Even couples that have big weddings do this as well just for the convenience.
Carrie says, “Even if your ceremony isn’t on the same day that you sign your license, it doesn’t mean your elopement is any less special or real. Your wedding day is more about committing yourselves to each other than signing a piece of paper!”
you need a budget
Or maybe you’re one of those lucky people that don’t and I love that for you. However, for the other 99%, do your research into the things & experiences you want and the places you’d like to go, how much they cost, and carve out a rough budget based on your priorities and what’s feasible for you both. Don’t rule something out just because you think it will be out of reach, get quotes first! Here are the major money points to consider:
Flights, rental car / gas
Accommodations
Attire + Rings
Location permits and fees
Marriage license
Vendors (Photographer, Videographer, Florist, Hair, Makeup, etc.)
Food / Drinks
Activities and Excursions
Carrie says, “You’ll be surprised at just how amazing your day can be, while still spending less money than you would on planning a bigger, more traditional wedding. This is your WEDDING DAY. It deserves to be everything you want.”
imagine your dream day
When it comes down to it, you want your wedding day to be special and the whole point of an elopement is for it to be an intimate moment between the two of you (and possibly a few close loved ones), so why not make it exactly how you dreamed. Where do you feel your best and your happiest? What do you and your fiance like to do together or go together? Do what feels right for YOU.
Note: Want more tips on how to include your family/friends in your elopement? Carrie has a blog post on that right here.
Carrie says, “One of the biggest steps to planning your elopement is having a vision for the day that feels authentic and meaningful to you. Take this vision with you as you finalize all the details of the day.”
Choosing your location
Since elopement is all about NOT having the pomp and circumstance of a big wedding (which, TBH, is centered around guest experience), location and experience are the main parts of your big day. Do you want to go back to a place that is special or sentimental to you and your partner? Do you want to discover somewhere new together? Wherever you decide, make sure it’s your happy place. Here’s what to consider:
Scenery: where are you? At the beach? On a snowy mountaintop? Hiking through fall foliage or red rocks?
Accessibility: How strenuous do you want your wedding day to be? i.e. hiking up a mountain in a tight mermaid dress. If you’re inviting guests who might have mobility issues or are older, take into consideration when researching locations
Privacy: if you’re outdoors and in a public space (hiking trails, parks, landmarks, etc), your intimate moments might be surrounded by strangers. This can be distracting and chip away at the romantic idea you had in your head. Carrie recommends choosing a weekday or sunrise time to avoid crowds and allow yourselves to have a more private ceremony.
Weather and time of year: regardless of where your location is, seasons should always be a consideration. Even warm weather places have rainy or stormy seasons. Example: desert places are best during the spring and fall to avoid extreme temperatures. Definitely be a little flexible on the date so you can get your most ideal weather scenario out of the location you pick.
Carrie says, “Your wedding day will feel like a “full circle” moment as you add a significant milestone to all the other special memories of that place. On the other hand, choosing a location you’ve never been to before means your wedding day memories will forever include experiencing that place together for the first time. This adds a new element of excitement to planning that really can’t be beat!”
picking a date
Speaking of weather, this is a major factor when picking your elopement date (see case in point above). If you’d rather get married on a date that has more significance to you, pick your location around that instead! But if you want your wedding on February 14th and you hate the cold, I would not suggest picking the Northeast of the US as your wedding location.
Carrie says, “Make sure you consider all the other factors that go into your day when making your final decisions.”
the big one: vendors
Obviously, this will look different for everyone depending on how you want your day, but here are a few vendors that most couples will need to hire:
A photographer: just as with any other niche market, picking someone who specializes in elopements is ideal. Ultimately, you want someone that you get along with, who makes you feel comfortable, and that you love their editing style. The whole point in hiring a professional photographer is to get your most special moments captured while you look and feel your best, so make sure they’re the right one for you. Remember, they’ll be with you ALL day (or more).
An officiant: We discussed this in the “legalities” section at the beginning, but if you want to get legally married on your wedding day you need to hire an officiant. Otherwise, you’ll need to get legally married prior and then whoever you’d like can conduct the ceremony. Fun fact: Carrie is ordained and has officiated her couples weddings before!
Hair and make up artist(s): It’s your special day, why not look your absolute best? You deserve it. We have a whole blog post on hiring for hair and make up, click here to read.
Florist: Again, this will depend on what kind of day you’re planning, but having a bouquet is always lovely!
Carrie says, “I encourage you to think first about what your DREAM elopement day looks like, estimate the costs of that (reach out to vendors for quotes), and THEN compare that to your financial situation. If you need to adjust your priorities, that’s okay!”
Elopement attire
This one’s quick, but still wanted to emphasize that you should always pick your dream outfit! Just because you’re not getting married in front of 200 people or have a traditional venue, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to get married in something special. This is your wedding, wear what makes you feel your best and brings out your most confident self. It’s also important to note that you should consider location and weather when packing for before and after the ceremony: proper hiking boots, rain jacket, extra clothes, etc.
Carrie says, “These little details are pretty easy to take care of towards the end of your planning, but don’t forget about them.”
As we always say on this blog, you do you, boo. Your day is exactly that…YOUR DAY. I think one of the reasons I was so excited to do a blog post about Carrie is because of how much she encourages couples to do what’s best for them and makes them shine in the most authentic way. She says, “This is the day you and your partner commit yourselves to each other and you’ll look back on it for the rest of your lives! There are no rules here, so have fun with your planning and make your day exactly what you want it to be.”
Carrie is originally from a small town in Missouri, but is now based in Southern California where she lives with her partner and two adorable kitties. She frequently travels all over CA, as well as the Western USA and internationally, to capture those special and intimate moments for her clients. I highly suggest you follow her on Instagram @carrierogersphotography and grace your feed with all her gorgeous photos. If you’re looking to learn more or book her for a session, check out her website, www.carrierogersphotography.com.
Samantha Shammas, Author and Owner of SamiaLynn
